Programs & Services > Counselling > Community Parenting Education (COPE) > Issues you may be facing
Issues you may be facing
How to communicate more effectively
with your kids | Preventing and limiting conflict
with your children | When you're seeing red - Guidelines
to help you cope | How to find more quality time
with your kids
Preventing and limiting conflict with your children
Fighting within families is a common problem. However, living in the "war zone", where kids are fighting on a regular basis, often leaves parents feeling tired, stressed out and wondering whether their children's behaviour is somehow their fault. Parents are always looking for new ways to get along better with their children and to decrease fighting. The following are some tips to help prevent and limit conflict with your children:
Use positive discipline and offer guidance that teaches your children the rules and values of life and how to take responsibility for themselves:
- Establish and preserve a loving relationship
with your child.
Show your child love, trust and respect everyday (i.e. give hugs, pats on the back, spend undivided attention time with each child, respect child's feelings). Have fun together and enjoy each other's company.
- Establish a "child-friendly" home
with reasonable routines and clear expectations appropriate
to the child's age and temperament.
- Recognize when your child is being
good and trying hard. Reward him with compliments or praise
about his behaviour and efforts.
- Plan ahead, especially in times of
transition or when your are anticipating additional stress. Explain
in advance what needs to happen; involve your child in planning,
help him/her to cope with change; be aware of child's strengths
and limits.
- Don't sweat the small stuff: know
the difference between a mountain and a mole hill. Especially
with teenagers, choose your battles carefully.
- Offer choices, and within
reason, allow children to make mistakes. This is how they
will learn.
- Be aware of your stress levels. Know
your own limits and avoid being pushed beyond what is tolerable.
Practice self-care.
To arrange for counselling, please call our Service Access Unit, Tel: 416.595.9618
